Looking Up and Out: Building Authentic Community with the People Around Me

Earlier this fall, as I was walking across campus to class, I was suddenly struck by the fact that I intentionally avoid interacting with other people. I keep my gaze focused on the sidewalk in front of me, trying desperately to avoid awkward encounters. As I pass somebody, I often wonder, Do I know this person well enough to greet them by name? Do they remember me from the class we had together last semester? She liked my post on Instagram, but surely she doesn’t remember who I am. I allow myself to disappear in a bubble of my own creation, failing to recognize my daily walk to class as a beautiful opportunity to connect with my brothers and sisters in Christ.

I have always prided myself on my ability to form profound connections with other people (usually over a black Americano and a scone at the local coffeehouse). But when it comes to those every day encounters with mere acquaintances, I shake straight to the soles of my beloved ballet flats. Fortunately, God never stops pushing me to look up and out at the world around me. After all, God created us to be in authentic community with one another as human beings. He created us for more than silent head nods of grudging acknowledgement, for more than eyes downcast to look at phone screens. He doesn’t want us to live in the confusion of not knowing whether to voice our greetings or keep communication to a simple double-tap on an Instagram post.

God did not create us to avoid one another.

He created us to boldly pursue one another. To look up from the gravity of our own fear and insecurity that pulls us downward. And He wants us to look out at the cloud of witnesses that surrounds us.

Earlier this summer, I started reading a series of letters written by Catholic priest and theologian, Henri Nouwen. These letters, entitled Life of the Beloved: Spiritual Living in a Secular World, address the need for Christians to recognize their true identity as God’s beloved children. As I read Nouwen’s reflections on the profound love that God has for each and every one of us, I decided I needed to share this resource with others in my life. I talked to a number of my friends and acquaintances and invited them to attend a weekly discussion group centered around Nouwen’s powerful reflections. And by opening myself up to the power of authentic Christian community, God began to work in the most amazing ways possible.

For the next eight weeks, my friends and I talked about our greatest fears and our even greater blessings. We acknowledged that we didn’t have life figured out yet and we embraced that uncertainty with boldness of heart. We laughed together, prayed together, shared our sorrows and our joys. And after every meeting, I walked away with a sense of tremendous peace in my heart. I felt that peace deeply because I knew I had experienced community as God had intended it.

So, despite my fear of what other people may think of me, I have chosen to cling to this invitation that God has placed on my heart: the invitation to encounter my brothers and sisters in Christ more deeply. Whenever I am on my early morning walk to class, I strive to set aside my insecurities about whether or not someone remembers me and I choose to greet them confidently by name. And instead of complimenting a friend’s outfit on Facebook, I strive to put away my phone and verbally acknowledge beauty when I see it.

What might happen if we start looking up to meet the eyes of our neighbors? What might happen if we start looking out at the authentic community in which God has invited us to participate?

Photo by EJR Photography

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